Hello and good morning. I hope you’re all as well as you can be—which is sort of self-fulfilling, since you can’t in principle be better than you actually are at any given moment, and so you’re always as well as you can be, however disappointing that fact might seem.
I walked to the train station this morning—making quite good time, it ought to be said—because I had more issues with my new bike on the way back to the house yesterday evening. It was raining, not insignificantly, when I arrived at the train station in the evening, but I was reasonably okay with that. As I’ve written before, I’m a veteran of riding a scooter in thunderstorms and even tropical storms*, so the rain, though irritating, was not a terrible bother. If anything, it can help one’s endurance, supplementing the cooling effects of sweat. I also wrapped my computer quite thoroughly, and as you can tell from the fact that I’m using it to write this, my protective covering worked well.
No, the real issue was the bike seat—although now at least it rests on a post that hasn’t fallen into the frame. But it simply would not stay level. I had done my best to tighten the thing down when assembling it, but perhaps the rain made that tightening less secure. So, all the way back to the house from the train, I had to perch myself just so on the seat to keep it from suddenly tilting backwards, and I didn’t always succeed. This did not make the process of riding through the rain and puddles any easier.
By the way, there are no fenders on this bike, so there’s a fair amount of mud splash now on my backpack. I don’t mind the cosmetics, but the grittiness is nearly maddening when I get it on my hands. I hate grittiness and stickiness. I always have, but I was raised, or trained myself, to avoid indulging in avoiding such irritations, though they make me feel disgusting. I basically take the life approach that I don’t have any right to be comfortable. This makes me able to endure a lot, but it probably contributes to the fact that I have needed to endure a lot, if you see what I mean.
Anyway, I had already noticed a little wobbliness to the seat despite my best efforts, and so ordered a decent socket wrench set—since I couldn’t find the one I used to own—which was supposed to be delivered yesterday afternoon. Obviously, since I bothered to bring it up, and since I said, “supposed to be”, it didn’t arrive.
Perhaps the rain contributed to the delays in deliveries, but it was quite irritating, especially since one of the things that kept me motivated to keep riding was thinking that once I got back to the house, I was going to get out my new socket wrench set and tighten that seat into place until nothing would make it budge. But I couldn’t.
The anger I felt toward the seat while riding probably helped with my speed back to the house last night. I certainly didn’t feel as fatigued as I had felt the previous night or yesterday morning, though perhaps the rain helped that, too.
In any case, it wasn’t as though I could sensibly choose not to ride the rest of the way to the house. At least, I couldn’t do that without just giving up on everything entirely, which I do consider on a frequent basis. There are many times when I just want to be like the man in the video for the Radiohead song, Just, and simply lie down where I am and let the elements take me. I still might do it someday.
Unless I’m going to do that, though, I have to get to where I’m going, and sooner is better than later when it’s raining, so I pedaled away. I was soaked completely through by the time I got to the house. And my new socket wrench set was not there.
So, anyway, now I’m writing this on the train, having walked this morning, and the train’s electrical system seems to have begun to have issues. The air conditioning and some of the lights keep going out with a sort of humming groan as they fail, then popping back on after a moment or two, only to fail again. It’s actually rather funny. As long as it doesn’t affect the train’s ability to move, I’m relatively okay with it, but it is irritating that it keeps coming on and off.
At least the fact that I walked this morning allowed me to wear my new hat, which I rather like, but which couldn’t be worn when biking, since the relative wind would almost certainly make it fly off. You have to take your silver linings where you can find them—if you can find them.
But so much of life is irritating. It’s always been thus. Maybe my tendency not to try to correct or avoid things that irritate me, out of some cultural tendency or implicit stoic philosophy or whatever, has led to the accumulation of more irritations than are tolerable, until finally they have worn me down almost completely, and soon I will crumble and blow away in the wind. I can’t say that would be terribly disappointing for me.
I suppose, if I do give in and fail soon, you’ll more or less be able to tell by the fact that I’ll suddenly stop writing. I wouldn’t think that would be much of a loss. In the meantime, I’ll keep boring you with my idiocy, and you can indulge your masochism by reading it.
*No full-fledged hurricanes, though; even I am not that ridiculous.