And keep my drooping eyelids open wide, blogging on darkness which the blind do see

Good morning and welcome to Thursday.  As I repeat ad nauseam, or at least omni septimana, it’s time for another edition of my blog post.

I considered making this one of the posts (of which I warned you) in which I would share YouTube links to the “videos” in which I read some of my stories aloud, as a sort of poor man’s Audible.  I say “poor man’s” not because it’s more expensive for the author to use Audible; quite the contrary.  I could upload the audio of my stories onto Audible and charge for those without any more difficulty than is entailed by uploading and sharing them on YouTube, and I’d make money if people listen to them.  Whereas my YouTube channel is not in any way monetized (for me, anyway; I’m sure the folks at Google make money from it).  Thus, even the poorest of hominids can hear me read my stories without having to pay anything above the cost of their broadband service.

As I’ve said before, I enjoy reading my stories out loud, and though the editing process is not as fun as the reading, it was what set me on the path to learning how to record and mix my music, so I can’t complain about it*.  Given that, and given the fact that I’m within striking distance of the final edit of Unanimity, I’m thinking about doing some more audio—perhaps reading another of my short stories aloud, or perhaps just continuing with The Chasm and the Collision, of which I’ve uploaded the first nine chapters only.  However, it would be nice to have some feedback, one way or another, before putting forth all that effort.

Speaking of feedback, I don’t know if any of you have been commenting on or otherwise responding to my blog posts (here or on Iterations of Zero) via Facebook or Twitter, but if you have, I must apologize.  Though I have shared many videos and some articles, and of course my blog posts, on both of those social media, I haven’t gotten on either of the sites in a dog’s age**.  The problem is that getting on Twitter and/or Facebook stresses me out tremendously, largely because those sites make me feel ever more depressed about the state of humanity and, by extension, the universe.

I don’t know if it’s really the case that humanity is getting stupider and more petty and pathetic with every passing moment, or that social media and for-profit “news” and similar projects just do a wonderful job of highlighting the idiocy and inanity that’s always existed.  I also don’t know which answer would be worse.  But as someone who already, despite medication, struggles almost every day with suicidal feelings***, I really don’t need to throw gasoline on the fire.

Therefore (∴), if you’re trying to give me feedback or to reach me in any way, your surest bet (if you don’t already have my email address) is probably just to leave a comment here or on Iterations of Zero.  WordPress is, at least, a form of social media (if it counts as that) which I use nearly every day.  I guess you could also comment via YouTube.  I tend to watch one or more videos there daily.  I can’t go for long without Sixty Symbols or Numberphile or any of several British comedy panels shows without having severe withdrawal symptoms.

I don’t assume that anyone is actually trying to reach me, mind you.  I’m not that egotistical.  As far as I know, I could turn to dust right after posting this and no one would ever realize it, apart from minor and brief inconveniences for people where I work.  But just in case anyone is trying to reach me who doesn’t already have a more direct connection, I thought I’d give notice.

I don’t know if this counts as wishful thinking, especially since the prospect of any type of social interaction tends to leave me at least mildly anxious.  It may just be a conflicted “cry for help” kind of thing, such as might be produced by a person who has never been good at seeking assistance in anything—because he doesn’t honestly believe that he deserves help of even the most miniscule kind, even if it’s available—and for whom more traditional attempts to express a need for urgent aid have occasionally led to personal disasters.

With that, I think I’ve said all that I have to say for this week.  I’ve probably said far more than I had to say.  I won’t end with, “The rest, is silence”—not yet, anyway—but will instead close with my traditional,


*Others might have cause to complain that I learned to record, produce, and share my own songs, but that’s another matter.

**It’s a young dog’s age, to be fair—a puppy, really.  But it has been a while.

***I wrote a post on IoZ about this fact.  This urge is often triggered or worsened by concurrent trans-Thanos-level, genuscidal**** wishes in response to the above-noted stupidity of humans and is part of why I tend to write horror-related stories.

****This is a new term that I just coined, it’s not a misspelling.  It refers to the intention or aim or urge to wipe out all members of a particular genus.  So, in this case, for instance, even any extant Homo erectus would not be safe.